An Instant of Selfishness.

I never really considered myself to be a selfish person...but then again, before tonight, I guess I had never given it substantial thought. Tonight, I've been humbled yet again...and not at an easy cost.

You know how sometimes you can want something so bad that you soon find yourself with tunnel vision (perhaps without realizing it)? I found myself wanting to spend time with one of my friends today. We hadn't kicked it in a good while, and we had agreed we would try to hang out this weekend. I knew that my weekend would be rather relaxing, but still I looked forward to chill time with a good friend.

By the time 9 o'clock p.m. rolled around, and still no word...I became a little agitated. I had been looking forward to fellowshipping...clearly, I spend a lot of time on my own these days. Anyway, I tried to remain patient, but still my frustate-o-meter was rising ever so slightly with the progression of time.

Then, bam...I got the the text saying 'I won't be able to hang out, my Sister isn't responding.' My friend, whose Sister was in the hospital, now had way more to be thinking about than merely hanging out with me. I felt so bad. Why hadn't I considered all of this before? I had known that she was in the hospital. I had known that the family had come down to be with her. I had known that it wasn't anything minor...that she was seriously sick. But still, I was concerned with hanging out, socializing...only concerned about me and my time.

The cold realization that I would be devastated if my Brother was in the hospital, let alone maybe even going on to be with the Lord, made me sick to my stomach. And here I am texting to find out when we would be hanging out....as I so often say, WHO DOES THAT?

Rite about now, I feel slightly embarrassed. I didn't realize that I could be the least bit self-absorbed. I mean, I know we all have our moments...but goodness, am I slipping? I am resolving to always consider others before myself at all costs now. My Pastor always says in order to have JOY you must use J.O.Y. That means keeping Jesus first, Others second, and Yourself last...I guess that is a strategy I will have to employ much, much more in my life.

Final thought...if you haven't given much thought to being selfish, chances are you need to think about self less and become more selfless. Even the tiniest bit of being more concerned for yourself, if only for a moment, can make you lose sight of giving a second measure of concern for the welfare of others. I'm not saying that its not okay to never think about your own wants and needs, but just make sure that if other people are involved, that you think about their wants and needs just as much as, more than, or even before your own....an instant of selfishness, could be at the cost of someone else's life.

The REAL Deal About Swagg....

We've all heard it by now...we've all heard others saying or singing about it...we may have even caught ourselves adding it to our own vernacular. The new "it" word in the urban, contemporary world has hit the scenes like a tsunami: SWAGG.

Personally, I do believe that swagg is a viable word with a proper definition. I define swagg as having a certain confidence which exudes oneself in the way he or she carries him or herself, handles business, and conducts daily life. We've all seen it too! Ladies, we know when a young man has bonefied, official swagg! The way he walks, talks, dresses...even the most mundane things he does spell c-o-n-f-i-d-e-n-c-e. Fellas, yall have seen it in women as well. That woman walking by with her head held high, smelling good, looking nice, and handling her business....Miss Independent, if you will.

However, let us stop and think about how the word swagg is being thrown around as an adjective instead of a verb. I have now seen and heard, in the past few weeks, so many young people referring to themselves as having a certain insurmountable amount of swagg predicated by:1.) how much money they make, 2.) how cute/fine they (think they) are, 3.) the car they drive, 4.) the house or apartment they live in, and/or 5.) other temporal THINGS that shall fade away.

But you know...I am starting to wonder about how much thought this widely coined phrase evokes when being constantly over-used. Do the people always keeping this word in the forefront of their everyday diction really even have the swagg they claim to have? For me, I struggle to believe this so-called level of swaggerdom you've achieved if you are always speaking on it, making mention of it, or drawing attention to it. Do you really have swagg if you have to TELL everyone that you have swagg? Does your standard of what swagg truly is even classify you as having swagg? For me, having stacks of benjamins, driving a nice car, and looking nice is not a major proponent of the formula that yields swagg.

I'd like to think someone who has arrived at a level of achievement in life that allows them to live comfortably and confidently while maintaining a quiet humility about themselves is the true characteristic of REAL swagg. Someone who oozes confidence, professionalism, intelligence, and wisdom without saying one word. Someone who makes you feel an extra iota of security all because their presence is near....REAL swagg is not an adjective, it is a verb...it is a state of mind and being. Not something to describe yourself, but a way in which you carry and govern yourself. It is someone who never ever thinks of himself (or herself) more highly than he ought (Romans 12:2-3: 2 And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God. 3For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man that is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly, according as God hath dealt to every man the measure of faith.)....


Think about it....real Swagg doesnt need accolades, compliments, or statements about how much swagg he or she has..it just is. It is a state of mind and being that exists without being boisterous. Gentleman (and ladies) take note...humble yourselves, stop thinking more highly of yourself than you ought...just let your swagg do its own talking.